Consent is now a key concept in discussions about sex and relationships. Yet, apparently, few of us actually know what it is. Some now argue that consent should be ‘active’, ‘affirmative’ or ‘communicated’, while others maintain that the process of consenting is often done implicitly,  without necessarily following a clear pattern.

Some have suggested we are experiencing a ‘crisis in consent’, which in turn is leading to an upsurge in sexual violence. Recent debates around rape and sexual assault on university campuses have focused on the need to teach young men about consent to prevent them from unwittingly committing rape, or even just becoming subject to an allegation of sexual misconduct. Campaigns such as Consent is Sexy aim to persuade young men to sign a pledge that states: ‘I Pledge to Only Practice Consensual Sex. I understand Sexual Consent should always be informed and freely given: Without pressure, entitlement, intimidation or fear.’ In order to guarantee consent is indeed freely given, there is now everything from smartphone apps to downloadable sexual consent forms, which individuals are encouraged to fill out in advance of a sexual encounter. 

The government has also become involved in the consent debate by suggesting consent should be taught to children in primary school as part of learning about ‘healthy’ relationships. The National Union of Students now runs consent workshops across UK campuses to teach students about how to seek consent and confirm a partner is consenting. Advocates of teaching consent say it can make our sex lives more communicative and considerate – and even more fun – but critics object that attempts to ‘educate’ people about consent are intrusive. 

So is consent something that can be taught,  or are we overcomplicating something that should be intuitively obvious? Are we in danger of removing the spontaneity from human interaction? Does the threat of rape and sexual violence justify these kinds of interventions into people’s sex lives, or should we keep the intimate part of our love lives more firmly behind closed doors?